Monthly Archives: November 2015

Mikeys Bistro Burger and Marble Mouth

I went out on a limb this week and decided to think outside the box and go to the Breakfast Bistro in the east end “Burger at a breakfast joint” is not something you would typically hear from the Burger Shake Club.

My celebrity guest was none other than everyone’s favourite Roughrider Ryan Smith……er….. Ryan Dressler ……..dammit, Weston Dressler!
Weston has known for some time he would be my guest of honour as we have shared many delicious burgers over the years and I wanted to do him the honour of joining us for lunch.
Once seated, our witty banter was at an all- time high between the founding fathers but Dressler was lost in thought as he visually assaulted the breakfast menu and dessert cooler.
We all chose the “Bistro Burger” ( only burger on the menu) and ordered it to our individual specifications as it comes adorned with red onions, avocado, and other veggies and sauces I can’t pronounce.
Once it arrived with fresh thick bacon on the side to eat separately or add to the burger, pretzel buns (imported from France) and patties infused with Pork we all got down to business.
The hand- made patties have a unique taste and are not your typical burger but delicious all the same. Everyone enjoyed the burgers and raved about the pretzel bun. The only time it was difficult to enjoy the burger was when Danny Y wouldn’t stop giggling like a school girl because Premier Brad Wall now follows him on Twitter.
Jason did his best to corral his ketchup and burger juices but inevitably spilled it on his dress shirt and personalized Danny Y BS Club place mat (soon to be sold online for $3.99). It was a daring choice but also a successful choice as the burger ratings were favourable:

Burger Avg Score: 39.75/50

With a good start to our day and a belly full of burger we took a quick trip around the corner to Marble Slab Creamery.

As we entered we became excited as the décor looked as though Strawberry Shortcake and Willy Wonka had married and started an interior decorating business. The place looked like an ice cream paradise.
By this point the burger had awoken Dressler from his mid –day fog and he was vibrant and ready to tackle a milkshake.
The choices at the Marble Slab were abundant and JC and I went with a chocolate, cookie dough concoction while Danny Y and Dressler went another route. We were all very excited watching the process of our shakes being created but that excitement quickly vanished as we were handed our shakes, not in cold metal tins, and watched as the shake tried to spill over the side of the cup and join the burger juices on JC’s dress shirt.
Right then and there I knew I had made the wrong choice. The Shakes were flavoured liquid. No thickness, no extras and it left a “chalky” aftertaste. I knew I was in for a ratings nightmare when I looked into Danny Y’s sky blue eyes and saw nothing but disappointment. I have never felt so ashamed in my life.
Letting down the human hoover of milkshakes was heartbreaking.
Dressler tried to keep a positive outlook but it was too far gone. JC, as of being dropped off from lunch had still not finished his shake and protested he would, but I knew it was a hollow promise. By far one of the most disappointing shakes we have had to this point:

Milkshake Avg score: 28.5/50

Cumulative Avg Score with Celebrity Ranking: 71.7%

The Milkshake made it so I had no chance to win this round and in fact came last by a large margin.
Thanks again to our celebrities: Mr. Brad Wall, Mr. Dan Farthing and Mr. Dressler , you were all worthy of our BS Club lunches.
Congratulations to Mr. Clermont for winning the Celebrity Round
Next round is his choice, will it be the home round, redemption round, mission impossible round or some other creation of JC’s.

Stay tuned to find out.

 

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Colter’s Dad at Nicky’s Cafe

Rewind to 2006:

Heard at a pre-teen birthday party in Swift Current:

“Craig! Mark! Sweet that you guys could make it up to my party!” – Colter

“Dude, we wouldn’t miss it for the world” – Craig

“Yeah.” – Mark

“Ok, so lets just go over the plan again before we smash this piñata and destroy some cupcakes:  Our Dads are super lame, and getting on our nerves so we will get them involved in running the province to keep them busy while Colter can continue slapping the bass and Mark and I can keep shredding powder and macking babes, hopefully landing an MTV gig.” – Craig

“Yeah.” – Mark

“Technically I don’t ‘slap the bass’, I’m more of a cross between Jonny Cash and…” – Colter

“PINATA TIME!!!” – Craig

“Yeah.” – Mark

And thats how it came to be.  Brad Wall and Don McMorris were thrust to the forefront of Saskatchewan politics, which eventually led us to the historical day proclaimed by Colter’s Dad as:

“THE BEST WORK LUNCH EVER. HANDS DOWN!” – Brad Wall, November 2nd, 2015

We invited Mark and Craig’s Dad as well, but measures of Provincial Security forbid the two men to eat the same food, in the same building, at the same time. Understandable.

Mikey and I picked Colter’s Dad up from the Leg and Danny Y met us at Nicky’s to secure prime seating.  When we arrived, Colter’s Dad couldn’t quite place where he knew Danny Y from, but we have a photo in the blog that may help jog his memory.  (The former PM must have been a big BS Club fan as well)

On to the Burgers and Shakes.  We hit up Nicky’s Cafe and everyone under the age of 50 ordered Nickys famous “Nicky’s Jumbo Burger”:

nicky’s jumbo burger
14.95
open wide. the big burger for the really big appetites. this is an awesome double-meat, double-cheese, special sauce, lettuce, tomato, fried onions, pickle, on a toasted sesame-seed bun.

Colter’s Dad looked at it, talked about it, wanted it and made a choice with his head instead of his stomach.  He let the impending “Question and Answer” session at the Leg factor into his decision to take a more conservative approach to his order.  A wise forward thinking and responsible choice, but had he been more liberal with his schedule that day, I’m sure he would have chosen the jumbo.  Instead he picked:

the natural burger
11.95
a burger purist’s burger. a perfect, secretly seasoned patty, charbroiled to perfection & placed open-faced atop a lightly buttered, toasted sesame-seed bun. served with tomato slices, fresh lettuce, dill pickles & fried onions naturally.

Mikey ordered his burger NDP as always (No Damn Pickles) and asked for the 1000 island sauce to be left off his bun.  The server was obviously star struck by Danny Y in his super-extra-medium T-shirt and brought Mikeys burger with the sauce.  Mikey turned full ‘Champ’ and almost lost it, but I quickly asked her to bring a new bottom bun. Crisis averted. She advised Mikey that his bun would be right out as it was just being toasted.  It came, but wasn’t toasted an unfulfilled promise that wasn’t well received at the table but I chalk it up again to Danny Ys painted on shirt and dreamy eyes.

Burgers were delicious and scored strong:

Burger Avg: 39.5/50

It was now time to Shake things up:

The Founding Fathers all went with chocolate while Colter’s Dad kept in line with his ‘Purist’ theme and opted for vanilla:

The shakes came out in a frosty tin, with the straw standing firm in the thick milkshakes.  This was the Holy Grail of shakes and would have secured out of this world scores if there were more options or toppings.  Regardless, the size, thickness and taste were all scored very high by all of our judges, leaving us with a formidable tally:

Shake Avg: 45.5/50

Finally, we judged our celebrity.  Colter’s Dad was well dressed, personable and somewhat fanatical about the club.  Although he kept referring to himself as an ‘Honorary Member’ (a title that had not been formally bestowed upon him), he was a fine Celebrity Guest as his score reflected:

Celebrity Avg: 45.67/50

This leaves JC in the lead with Mikey left to go:

Cumulative Avg Score for Burger Shake: 85/100

Cumulative Avg with Celebrity ranking: 87%

Wall_Harper_Danny BS_Nickys_Shake BS_Club_Nickys

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Celebrity Round – FATBURGER

NOT JEFF FAIRHOLM

My celebrity is a former Saskatchewan Roughrider, current head strength and conditioning coach of the Roughies and owner/CEO of Level 10 Fitness Inc. in Regina, none other than Dan ‘glass cutter hands’ Farthing!!!

I chose to take this CFL legend to Fatburger because I’ve heard great things about this burger establishment and I myself have never had a Fatburger.

Let me tell you, neither the burger nor the celebrity were a disappointment!

All 4 of us chose XXL Fatburger.  Our Celebrity dressed his up a little, where the 3 of us just went with meat and cheese!  First off, this burger was right off the grill as it was still steaming hot when they served it to us.  The abundance of cheese was melted to perfection and burger itself was extremely tasty!

The scores in the end showed that we were all on the same page, as the burger’s average score was 39.5/50!

The owner of Fatburger happened to be in the store at the time, and as the other 2 members of BSC are repeat visitors and local celebrities themselves, we were treated with an order of mini donuts and caramel dipping sauce!  And let me tell you, those were AWESOME!!!  If you’re going in for the burger, stay for the mini donuts and take the rest of the caramel sauce home!

On to the shake….

Our celebrity went with the vanilla, and the three of us did a chocolate shake this time.  Once again, nobody was disappointed with their selection.  The shake was rich, thick and topped with whipped cream!  With the shake being as thick as it was, you can really take your time enjoying the rich flavour for a longer period of time.

The shakes here scored an average of 39.88/50!

Fatburger had an overall rating of 79.38

My celebrity was also scored and received an average score of 38.67/50

IMG_1742

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